Ever wonder why we're here? Why we exist? In our debut episode, hosts Mike and Chaya aim to explain why they've created this podcast along with how it ties into the grander question of finding your neurodivergent place in a neurotypical world. They share their personal stories of unmasking, learning to fight the societal status quo, shedding external validations, and building self-acceptance.
Ever wonder why we're here? Why we exist? In our debut episode, hosts Mike and Chaya aim to explain why they've created this podcast along with how it ties into the grander question of finding your neurodivergent place in a neurotypical world. They share their personal stories of unmasking, learning to fight the societal status quo, shedding external validations, and building self-acceptance.
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[Mike Cornell] You've landed at Spark Launch, the guide star for embracing what it means to be neurodiverse.
[Mike Cornell] I'm Mike Cornell, joined by CEO of Spark Launch, Chaya Mallavaram.
[Mike Cornell] Here, we navigate mental health triumphs and tribulations from all across the spectrum, charting a course to the shared experiences that unite us and discovering how to embody the unique strengths within neurodivergent and neurotypical alike, igniting your spark and launching it into a better tomorrow.
[Mike Cornell] Hello, everyone.
[Mike Cornell] I'm Mike.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'm Chaya.
[Mike Cornell] And welcome to Spark Launch.
[Mike Cornell] We're really excited to be here speaking with you on our very first episode.
[Mike Cornell] And to really start off, we wanted to explain a bit as to what the podcast is and answer the all important question of why we're here.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I, I truly believe that the neurodiverse population, have so much to offer to this world if we start living in our gifts and strengths that I believe all of us have.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And once we start doing that, we'll the the challenges are so much easier to handle and overcome.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, especially in the time of AI, I feel we have this, innate power to take the humanity forward.
[Chaya Mallavaram] This is my my weird, thinking and belief, that because we are so intricate and we are so complex that no machine can replace our brain and our mind.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so, and and but but it's important that we live in that brain.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Live in that complexity of our brain.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and once we start doing that, and we overcome all those challenges that we have, we we will, we will be thriving.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And I want and I truly believe we can do that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and that's why, I created the company so that we can get over the challenges, whatever the challenges are.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And some of them, you just accept it and start folks focusing on engagement strands.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] And, well, we live in a a long history where there's a thousand different arms pulling you away from yourself and who you are and to what exactly you're supposed to be doing.
[Mike Cornell] And with mental health challenges so much because we are in opposition to what we're feeling and guilt over what we what we're supposed to be feeling.
[Mike Cornell] There's a lot of supposed in regards to mental health and specifically with neurodivergency.
[Mike Cornell] I know for me, I'm I'm late diagnosed autistic.
[Mike Cornell] Still, the the the ADHD, diagnosis is, currently eluding me, but that's only because it's very hard for an adult to get such things.
[Mike Cornell] And for me, so much of my life was spent trying to and yearning to be normal.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] What is normal?
[Mike Cornell] Normal is, what's cultural osmosis is deemed it to be.
[Mike Cornell] It's very arbitrary.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] I I said something to someone the other night.
[Mike Cornell] I was talking, about autism about and, just neuroevortancy in general.
[Mike Cornell] And she had said, you know, for her, like, trying to get diagnosed with something, been curious about it, I should say.
[Mike Cornell] Said, like, you know, where the only thing that throws me off is, like, where does just where does just being weird starts and where does narrative urgency begin?
[Mike Cornell] And my point to her was how you know, the the question that really will trip you up is how much of our perception of what weird is has just been neurodivergency the whole time, but it's only just now starting to be understood.
[Mike Cornell] So you can chalk yourself up to being weird, or is it neurodivergency?
[Mike Cornell] And then how is weird negative?
[Mike Cornell] You know?
[Mike Cornell] How is neurodivergency negative?
[Mike Cornell] Why is weird different?
[Chaya Mallavaram] What a great point.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We are so used to saying weird.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] So it comes naturally to me to say that I'm weird and different.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But there's so much beauty in being weird because who cares if you're weird or different?
[Chaya Mallavaram] What really matters is what you do in this world.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so if, we stop focusing on things that, don't serve us, especially the methodologies of doing it, are or judging ourselves and judging others for who they are and judging for their weirdness or our own weirdness.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yes.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We, and and stop, like, really focusing on those things and just focus on on the impact on what you're doing and and how you're showing up in the world, and what work are you leaving behind by being yourselves, by being the beautiful you?
[Chaya Mallavaram] I think, I think we will all be our authentic selves and shine from that authentic beauty that we all have.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] This world is is built, in a way that we are born, and then we start focusing externally.
[Chaya Mallavaram] For instance, with school we go to, where you know, which area do you wanna live?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Where do you wanna it's it's so externally focused that we don't look inside of us.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And especially with the neurodivergent population, we all are so internally driven that, we first we need to figure out who we are and what our strengths and what are all those little things that we have to offer and then start then go external and start offering that to the world in our own unique, weird ways.
[Mike Cornell] Yes.
[Mike Cornell] Exactly.
[Mike Cornell] It's interesting to me that, like, autism and all that, like, it means, you know, of oneself.
[Mike Cornell] But so much of, quote, unquote, treatments for it or therapy for it is about unwinding yourself and moving yourself away by, you know, Abba therapy for autism is, Abba therapist tried to connect with me on LinkedIn the other night.
[Mike Cornell] I was like, nope.
[Mike Cornell] Not doing that.
[Mike Cornell] And because it's just about that.
[Mike Cornell] It's about changing neurodiver neurodivergency.
[Mike Cornell] And I I think it it's weird that in the naming scheme of things, like, etymology wise, that being of oneself was viewed as negative.
[Mike Cornell] But, you know, allistic being of all of of of being with other, that is seen as more positive.
[Mike Cornell] But it's so much of our society recommends and cherishes you being sure of yourself and steadfast.
[Mike Cornell] But if you actually do that, it is christened as weird and no, you need to get in line.
[Mike Cornell] And I've I've never really understood the dichotomy.
[Mike Cornell] And I think that maybe it's just something a lot of your divergence don't understand because of the way we tend to think in, like, very straight line logical ways is that we see the invisible lines between what is promoted and then what is actually done.
[Mike Cornell] Because to us, based on what's promoted, we should fit in.
[Mike Cornell] Right?
[Mike Cornell] We've everyone should actually like us, quote, unquote, more based on what we're seeing.
[Mike Cornell] But in actual practice, we're shot down for being too much or noncompliance or weird or a little bit off or we talk too much.
[Mike Cornell] And I I know for, like, for me, for my entire life with masking, not even knowing I was masking was just, like, trying to figure out, like, I wanted to embrace myself and who I was and and be who I was and see, like, the power that I held for my own life, but it wasn't getting me anywhere for the things that I needed to help serve me, you know, especially in social aspects.
[Mike Cornell] So I spent time masking from kind of one vague personality to another, never quite being myself except with maybe one or two people.
[Mike Cornell] I I would argue that I haven't really started being myself to my own family until about, like, five years ago.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Wow.
[Mike Cornell] There than that, I was probably I view a lot of me before that as, like, a weird stranger that I just kinda slipped into the skin of every single morning.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I think that happens all.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and we want to get to a place where we are absolutely in love with ourselves.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, yeah, I I had I mean, I didn't introduce myself as being ADHD.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I learned the term ADHD when my son got diagnosed with ADHD, and and that's when I started looking at all the traits and characteristics.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And I realized, oh my god.
[Chaya Mallavaram] That's me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Every single one of them.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, especially, my biggest trauma was in, just education, studying, because I had this ambition that I wanted to accomplish and be somebody.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and every time I sat in front of the books, it just went over my head.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I was a constant daydreamer talking a lot in the class, but at the same time, I was ambitious.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So that felt, like it was going against the wind.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I was not going with the wind, but just against the force.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so that's where my trying to fit in, trying to mask was was what where I was, but, felt uncomfortable.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So and but once I got out of the hall of cheers with I managed to get a degree in accounting.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Never really enjoyed it.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But, ever since then, I've tried to embrace myself fully.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And it's been a slow journey, but, but I'm somewhat there.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] So but it's such a relief, such a relief to to be myself 100%.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I don't know if it's 100% because I don't know what else is there.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] We are constantly uncovering, removing all those layers and figuring out what's what's beneath the surface.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so it feels uncomfortable when you're masking, and trying to be, somebody who we are not in the inside.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And as a child, I remember, I I always wanted, my mother to love me for who I am.
[Chaya Mallavaram] She she did.
[Chaya Mallavaram] She was a great mother.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But there was always that that, thing saying, oh, can I just just me?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Love me for not because you're I'm your child, but love me for me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But but before that, I think we we have to love ourselves.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] I I guess we never taught it, as as in the world to to just love ourselves.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I think it's it's a learned skill.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's something that now everybody talks about it because we are so such an externally focused trying to fit in.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Even even the families are getting asking their children to fit in.
[Chaya Mallavaram] They themselves are trying to fit in to the invisible standards because who's setting up these rules?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Who's setting up these standards?
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and so, it's just so, sad that, because of that, we feel, challenged, especially as, you know, the neuro diverse people.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But, but we can change that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] We can change that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We can at least change, that by, by looking at the the problems.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I I think this is where, it begins to actually acknowledging the pain and start talking about the discomfort, the traumas, and not just living in living with it.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So and examine it.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Examine the pain and see where it's coming from, and you sit with it and and dissect it and and just open it up and figure out, like, every little detail.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And then, and then that's where all the answers you get the answers to move forward.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that's why it's important to just acknowledge the pain.
[Mike Cornell] Knowledge it and not do, something which I absolutely hate, which is try to swipe it away with, unearned positivity or toxic positivity or, you know, I I think a a lot with, neurodivergers are difficulties.
[Mike Cornell] We're made to feel kind of guilty about them in a lot of ways, because either, well, you're I I'm I'm speaking as a uninformed neurotypical when I say this.
[Mike Cornell] Well, you're lower on the spectrum, so you you don't have anything to complain about.
[Mike Cornell] Or, oh, but, you know, look at all the amazing things your brain can do, you know, like, for some sort of lifetime original movie character or or something like no.
[Mike Cornell] There's some stuff that really sucks I deal with every single day, and I hate it sometimes.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] There's there's pros and cons just like there's pros and cons to being a neurotypical.
[Mike Cornell] You know?
[Mike Cornell] But don't, like, try to placate me with with not with saying I am not allowed to feel bad about things, either with past trauma or mental health struggles, what whatever else.
[Mike Cornell] And even if you're just neurotypical but but struggling with with mental health, one of the best lessons you can learn is to just wade into that pool and deal with what's there.
[Mike Cornell] It's okay you feel you feel your feelings.
[Mike Cornell] It's okay to mourn something even if it's yourself, and it's okay to be frustrated and sad.
[Mike Cornell] You have to feel those feelings.
[Mike Cornell] Otherwise, they're just gonna build up in the back of your head.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's it's important to feel the feelings, and it's important to sit with them.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's important to process them.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Because, yeah, when you process them, they'll you get so many messages.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And then you take those messages, and you can start implementing them.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that's how you move forward.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But it's important that we acknowledge and we, and not deny the pain.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Because what happens is if we keep denying it, you keep putting it away, and you can put it away for days, years, decades, and then and then it'll always come back.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Whatever you're living with it.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's like a baggage.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's that you're carrying this hundred pounds of luggage that you're carrying every single day.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] It's like painting over mold.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, but if we, fee because when we look at the pain, whatever that is, there might be some message saying whatever that is, right, to the individual, maybe move in a different direction or, do something else.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So, so it's really, really important for us to, sit with the pain and even to see where that is coming from.
[Chaya Mallavaram] For instance, anxiety.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I had a lot of that and even speaking.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So for me to even just come here and speak is a huge deal.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I was my voice was shut off.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I truly believe in in school because I was this talkative child.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I was constantly punished for talking in class.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Horrible, horrible punishment.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And I didn't know why.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] I didn't I had no idea.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and then you had to speak a certain way, or there's certain the language, for instance, and even just, the umms and ahs.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Rules like that, right, rules like that will stop me from being me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and so I had to believe in in me and more importantly as to why we are doing this.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that's where my motivation comes from.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Why are we even having this podcast?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Why is it so important to talk about mental health?
[Chaya Mallavaram] And why, especially, us?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Because, because we are, first of all, super sensitive people.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We all know that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] There's a lot of emotions, and we feel it, and we, we experiencing experience it a hundred times more, a thousand times more.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and we carry that those emotions with us.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and as a result of which, we are not serving ourselves or others.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and so it's really important for us to, acknowledge that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so for me, just speaking in my own voice, I needed a huge mission to do that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So when, and and then I said, okay.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I actually had to go to a class to learn how to speak from my heart.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that was just, it was beautiful because, that told me I was good enough, whoever I was, whatever I was.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and it's the same with everybody.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] We're all good enough just the way we are, but we are always looking for external validation because somewhere in my childhood, I was told that I needed somebody's approval Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] To be myself, It's so sad.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So the whole all my life, I've been like, who am I?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Who is Chaya?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Who is she?
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, and and yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And the answers come, I think, in following our heart and doing what we love.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, and for me, and you, both of us, I know we want to empower, this community and help them acknowledge and loving ourselves the way we are, and there's nothing called perfection.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Our show is not gonna be perfect.
[Mike Cornell] Right?
[Mike Cornell] It's it's all about Oh, lord.
[Mike Cornell] No.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I think Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] The we want to be as authentic as we are, and I yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'm sure if I listen to this, I will I will say, oh, Chaya, you said those words wrong or you pronounced it correctly or things like that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But I'm, I'm allowing, myself to make those flaws so that I can be authentic.
[Chaya Mallavaram] For me, that is way more important.
[Mike Cornell] It's funny.
[Mike Cornell] Like, one of the best things I was ever able to do for myself is I've been podcasting for a very, very, very long time, and I've been editing myself in podcast for a very, very long time.
[Mike Cornell] And at first, I was so self conscious because I'm I'm already self conscious about how the how I talk most of the time.
[Mike Cornell] I talk very autistically.
[Mike Cornell] Like, I when I finally started hearing other people other autistic people speak, I was like, woah.
[Mike Cornell] That that's I I cried the first time I heard someone converse in the same, like, twisted pattern that I, like, I converse in.
[Mike Cornell] Because I was always self conscious about it.
[Mike Cornell] But through years of editing and having to listen to myself, when you start have when you start, like, you start out, you edit yourself.
[Mike Cornell] So I'm just like, I'm trying to edit out all my put my words together so they make more sense, at least to me, because I am very self conscious.
[Mike Cornell] But it turned into so much work.
[Mike Cornell] I had to just start accepting how I talk, and then it just became normal.
[Mike Cornell] So I I was able I still deal with it, but I was able, for the most part, to separate, like, I'm not stupid because I talk that way.
[Mike Cornell] That's just how I talk.
[Mike Cornell] And Totally.
[Mike Cornell] And it goes back to kinda what you said that we're always looking to be as good as somebody else, as an as another.
[Mike Cornell] But we're, like, we're human beings.
[Mike Cornell] We're one single vessel.
[Mike Cornell] We are only capable of being as good as we ourselves are capable of being.
[Mike Cornell] So we just need to work on that and doing positive things for for ourselves.
[Mike Cornell] I don't like to say healthy things for ourselves, but in a way that goes towards what what we are at our core each individually.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We are, good enough, and, of course, we have growth.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] So we need we are we are here on this planet to learn and grow, to contribute, being ourselves.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But the but that's where, the skills are the the skills to be learned.
[Chaya Mallavaram] For instance, execution executive functioning was a learned skill for me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, I, but it's not the majority of my job.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'm living in in my strengths, but, but I had to learn it.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So it's important we learn it, but, but just being in our authentic selves feels natural, feels beautiful.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I wanted to ask you.
[Chaya Mallavaram] You said, autistic way of speaking.
[Chaya Mallavaram] What is what does that mean?
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'm I'm intrigued by that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I mean, I I
[Mike Cornell] I it's not a, homogeneous type thing.
[Mike Cornell] Though I I do think, a lot of autistics have, like, a very unique way of of kinda conversing and and speaking.
[Mike Cornell] I was, talking to somebody, another autistic yesterday, and we both, like, were talking about our verbiage because we always tend to use what other people describe as, like, unnecessary big words or or things like that.
[Mike Cornell] And to us, it's like, that really doesn't have anything to do with, like, intelligence or us being well read.
[Mike Cornell] Just we know the word, and that's the word that goes there.
[Mike Cornell] Like, so it doesn't occur to us to not use, like, the maybe, like, ridiculous word that hasn't been used in, like, two hundred years.
[Mike Cornell] To us, we just know that's what that word means, so it slips in there.
[Mike Cornell] But I've heard a lot of fellow autistics who speak very similar to me, which is kind of it's this stilt stop way of speaking where you're kind of, like, in a constantly constructing things.
[Mike Cornell] You use a lot of fillers.
[Mike Cornell] You kind of twist around where you start in one in one way of of going into the into going into a sentence.
[Mike Cornell] And then you take a left turn, and you're still in the sentence, but you're, you're now doing you're now putting it together in a completely new way.
[Mike Cornell] And then you circle back to how you originally were doing the sentence.
[Mike Cornell] And, eventually, you come at the end of what you were trying to say.
[Mike Cornell] And it's very confusing sometimes, I think, for other people to to listen, but it's just the way our brain processes information.
[Mike Cornell] Like, there's a start and stop, and we're we're kind of, like, pondering what we're saying.
[Mike Cornell] And, obviously, not everyone has this.
[Mike Cornell] And some but I think each auto autistic person tends to have a specific unique way of kind of, like, their own of of speaking and verbalizing.
[Mike Cornell] Some maybe talk a little bit faster.
[Mike Cornell] I know some speak much slower.
[Mike Cornell] I kind of I'm very stuttery.
[Mike Cornell] I use a lot of filler words, and I go back and forth in speed.
[Mike Cornell] Like, I'll either talk really fast or I'll ponder myself very slowly for no real reason, honestly.
[Mike Cornell] But it makes people think I'm deep in thought, which is pretty cool.
[Chaya Mallavaram] As you're describing that, I feel that's me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So I'm right.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'm like, that's exactly how I talk.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I definitely speed up, and I am lost in thought, so I'll ponder.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'll take that side road and, and pick up a few things, so who knows what I am.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] What else?
[Chaya Mallavaram] But it doesn't matter.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It doesn't matter.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But it's but what is great as you're describing that is, is is it's important to know that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Just just having that awareness, my, brain wanders is is, is amazing, because in that in that knowing, there's a lot of self acceptance.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, and I I I, for me, I have to, it's important to for me to let others know about that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And with my husband, I always tell him, I this is the way I speak.
[Chaya Mallavaram] This is who I am.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I will wander off.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I will go off the tangent, because, yeah, it happens.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's fine.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] Keeps things interesting.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It keeps things interesting.
[Mike Cornell] I I made a, I have to talk about social media, but I made an Instagram post, like, I think it was, like, last week or something.
[Mike Cornell] And I I was about social scripting, like, specifically, like, autistic social scripting.
[Mike Cornell] I I think nearly every so many neurodivergence deal with social scripting, but it was about I won't go into all of it, but the joke of it and something that's happened to me on numerous occasions is whenever I'm, like, ordering food, and this is either in person or over the phone, though it happens over the phone more often, is I have repeated, like, what I'm going to say to the person over and over in my head so much that when we start the conversation, I have said this has actually happened.
[Mike Cornell] Hi.
[Mike Cornell] I'm large pizza.
[Mike Cornell] And it's just the words get, you know, confused in there, and that's what blurts out.
[Mike Cornell] I've I've been other things too.
[Mike Cornell] You know?
[Mike Cornell] I haven't been just large pizza.
[Mike Cornell] I've been a sub.
[Mike Cornell] You know, I I've been various culinary delights.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Oh, wow.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] No.
[Chaya Mallavaram] That's happened to me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I used to think that I had to speak a certain way.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] So so I I've spoken to so many other people, and and that's the problem, that, a lot of them face is that they feel they have to, script and say words a certain way, and and a lot of energy is spent on just that script that you forget the content.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so which is what is really most important is is what is it that you wanna communicate and not how you're communicating.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, and so, yeah, that is where I learned how to drop into the heart space, kind of bypassing the brain and speak from the heart.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We were in, when I went to the workshop, we had we would break out into these rooms, and and other people would actually see me speak and say what they felt.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And they all had one or two positive things to talk about.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and I had to hear that to believe that I actually spoke with passion.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so it was, that's where I I I had to re had to learn how to not overthink with with the scripting, with the sentences Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And just drop into the hot space and speak from there.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that's what actually got me here, and I can talk from my heart right now and things that I'm passionate about.
[Mike Cornell] That's awesome.
[Mike Cornell] They yeah.
[Mike Cornell] It tends to be if you're passionate about it, you have an easier time talking.
[Mike Cornell] That's how it's always been for me.
[Mike Cornell] I can you know, we talk about film or literature or something.
[Mike Cornell] I'll go off forever and be and I have a perfectly easy time, but if you ask try to ask me about the weather or some, like, medical thing, I I would just Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] You know?
[Mike Cornell] I've I've literally now sometimes when I have to, like, call my doctor's office for information, I literally write it out on a pad because the only way I'm able to, like, stay focused enough in the conversation because I'm just I don't care that much, and I don't already don't wanna do it because I don't wanna make a phone call.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Exactly.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So it's so much easier when you work from your passion.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] Talk about things you're passionate about.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I I don't like to talk about the weather.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I don't like to talk about politics.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I don't like to talk about so many other things, and so I will not.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I won't even attempt to talk about it, and I will not be in that space.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Like, the weather, sometimes there are days that I, you know, I can go by without knowing what weather, is outside because I have this whole inner world of lot of variety and drama and so many interesting things that are happening inside
[Mike Cornell] of me.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I just never noticed, like, the winter, especially the New England winters, I so they can like, a month can go by without me even paying attention.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So I there's there's a good part to it.
[Mike Cornell] Yes.
[Mike Cornell] This might be, like, a really may have discovered something that's, like, a really neurodivergent thing, which is the confusion.
[Mike Cornell] Why is everyone so obsessed with the weather?
[Mike Cornell] Like, every time someone's talking about the weather, like, it's so rainy today.
[Mike Cornell] Oh, it's so sunny.
[Mike Cornell] Like, if it's too hot, it'll bother me.
[Mike Cornell] And even then, I'll just stay inside.
[Mike Cornell] But it's like, yes, we live on Earth.
[Mike Cornell] There's weather cycles.
[Mike Cornell] Like, that's just something that happens.
[Mike Cornell] Why are we talking about it?
[Mike Cornell] Like, I it is I like, I'm self aware enough to know that is, like, a super probably neurodivergent thing to to, like, be complaining about, but I am puzzled by that constantly.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I think it's the small talk.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Right?
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's just doing that small talk for the sake of talking.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's like there's
[Mike Cornell] so many other interesting things to be talking about.
[Mike Cornell] We could be talking about this or that or that or just
[Chaya Mallavaram] I know.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Let's start talking about the weather.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, tell me what the problem is.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I I always want to go, behind the layers, and I can actually also, see through people's layers, which is another talent or a skill, which I'm gonna use now.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that's how you and I met.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I just instantly knew we could be talking forever.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, yeah, that's, Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] That's a skill, so that's a gift.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I don't know where I was headed.
[Chaya Mallavaram] But Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] You know, were talking about Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] We were talking about so much.
[Mike Cornell] So much.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] If anybody is curious, this is actually the most, like, on topic we've ever managed to stay in one of our conversations.
[Mike Cornell] We before we, kinda, like while we still have time to talk about, I wanted you to tell the audience a bit of, like, what Spark launch does and and what what your hopes and and dreams for it are.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So, so I was inspired by my own personal story and, and also helping my son, find that spark within us.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So my belief is that we all have that light and spark inside of us.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And once we start first, we have to find that find a spark.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And once we start living in it, we can, overcome challenges.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so I wanna use that same thing to help others, to find that spark in other people, in people, who feel challenged for whatever reason.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and the reason is because we are trying to fit into a world that was not built for us.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So so to help them overcome challenges.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So what's spark launch right now is offering coaching, one on one coaching, because coaching, for me, is equivalent to meditation.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And that's how I overcame a lot of challenges by going deep inside myself and finding answers to my emotions.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And why am I feeling this way?
[Chaya Mallavaram] What is all this?
[Chaya Mallavaram] And and then a lot of it was believing in myself.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So so there's that internal journey, is what the coaches do.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Instead of doing it alone, you're doing it with a professional who's being trained to take that internal journey with the client.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And so by taking that internal journey, they can examine whatever the the problems are and and come up with the, action plan.
[Chaya Mallavaram] The Finding some problems.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And then to move forward from there.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So, that's and, also, I want to start offering workshops, and to to schools teaming up with teachers, and also workplaces.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I was in the corporate world for twenty two years, and there are a lot that needs to be done there as well.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So, it's it's fun.
[Chaya Mallavaram] It's gonna be fun.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I'm finally, I think, living in my, true state fully.
[Mike Cornell] I I would definitely say so.
[Mike Cornell] I I every time you talk about spark launch, I'm I'm always get very excited.
[Mike Cornell] I I love the whole concept behind it, specifically the education Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] Stuff because, so much about merit of urgency in education is completely misunderstood.
[Mike Cornell] Yeah.
[Mike Cornell] There is the misunderstanding that autism specifically means learning disability or learning deficiency.
[Mike Cornell] That is not true.
[Mike Cornell] It is not even close to true.
[Mike Cornell] There's, oh, boy.
[Mike Cornell] I could go on for that that for a while.
[Mike Cornell] But, yeah, just tailoring education to for the neurodivergent mind to better assist them because it just a matter that we learn a little bit differently.
[Mike Cornell] We may be a little more autonomous in how we learn as well, which which is why we tend to gravitate towards specifically subjects that we'll do on, like, our spare time more than subjects that are taught because they're not being taught in a way that stimulates us.
[Mike Cornell] Any little thing that is being done there, I'm always always very happy to hear, and I know your coaching system is gonna be very robust and gonna be very much, the kind that I strive for and and like to, both employ and promote.
[Mike Cornell] So thank you for for Spark Launch and everything that you're you're doing for that.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Oh, thank you, Mike.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I am so happy just to have met you, and I think it's a divine intervention.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I have had the way we met.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, yeah, I am extremely grateful for you to be with me on this journey.
[Mike Cornell] Thank you.
[Mike Cornell] Thank you.
[Mike Cornell] And, I thank the audience for also joining us on this journey of this very podcast.
[Mike Cornell] Hopefully, continuing to listen on in future episodes, we'll have lots of different types of content, either discussions.
[Mike Cornell] We plan to feature a lot of guests, so be on the lookout for that.
[Mike Cornell] Any way you can support us is, just greatly appreciated.
[Mike Cornell] You can rate and review us wherever you listen to podcasts.
[Mike Cornell] It's a wonderful way to to give that support, with what you're doing so we continue to make more of that.
[Mike Cornell] If you'd be interested in following us personally, on Instagram, I'm @followshisghost.
[Mike Cornell] Chaya, where can you find yourself and Spark Launch?
[Chaya Mallavaram] On Instagram, it's the_Spark Launch, the underscore Spark Launch, I think.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And, yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] And you can find the same name on Facebook.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I think I'm also on YouTube.
[Chaya Mallavaram] I have some people to do it for me.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So, yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] On LinkedIn.
[Chaya Mallavaram] LinkedIn.
[Chaya Mallavaram] Yeah.
[Chaya Mallavaram] You can find us there.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So I hope you all tune in and promise we're gonna not be boring.
[Chaya Mallavaram] We don't wanna bore ourselves
[Mike Cornell] with our content.
[Chaya Mallavaram] So, yeah, it's gonna be fun.
[Mike Cornell] See you next time.